Celebrate Mother's Day with a Broader Spectrum of What It Means to Be a Mom

It’s time to celebrate mothers! Across the United States, Mother’s Day is this Sunday, and many of us are shopping for cards, making brunch plans and/or reflecting on family. Though the holiday was founded by women’s peace groups as a way to unite families affected by the Civil War, it has become one of the most popular American holidays. Can you believe we collectively spend $1.9 BILLION on Mother’s Day flowers? Gotta make our moms happy!

Family and mothers come in a lot of different forms and motherhood can mean different things for various people. Many of us have special relationships with people we aren’t related to by blood, those who are our “chosen family”. We can also have strong bonds with our pets who we “mother.” Perhaps there are young people in our communities that we mentor directly or indirectly. Because Mother’s Day is promoted to be specifically about family, we often have a particularly narrow view of what mothers look like and this holiday can be difficult for many people. Not everyone comes from a family with a mother, father and a white picket fence.

In fact, more than three in four families in the United States are not a married heterosexual couple with biological children. We have same-sex couples, single mothers, adopted children, step-moms or families where moms have passed away and other people have stepped in to “mother.” Some people have tense relationships with their biological mothers and have other women in their lives that support them. Mothering means much more than just physically birthing a child.

There are some really iconic Moms in our pop culture, like Claire Huxtable (one of the flyest TV moms ever), Madonna as the “Material Mom” and now even Beyonce! These moms have shown the world that mothers can be beautiful and sexy. We also can point to women like Oprah who has no biological children but has adopted hundreds of South African school girls through her leadership academy, and Christy Turlington who has been incredibly dedicated to maternal health through her charity, Every Mother Counts. And how could I forget another Green Feminine Hygiene Queen, our First Lady Michelle Obama, America’s “Mom-in-Chief,” who has been mothering all of us through her organic eating awareness campaigns and “Let’s Move” anti-obesity initiatives.

Who are the women in your life that give you motherly love but aren’t your biological mothers? What about your aunts? Your sisters? That includes special women in your life that you’re not related to. Those relationships can be just as important as those with your mothers…after all, we need our aunties and sisters to dish with about our latest romantic escapades, give us a kick in the ass to make the next career move, or encourage us when we are feeling scared.

Who were the women you could ask what tampons or birth control they recommend? Who are the girls that will confide in you when that day comes for them? Who are the women who nurse you through heartbreak? Who are the gals that will celebrate your new promotion? Who can you trust to go bathing suit shopping with you? (That’s serious business!) Who are the women that you can entrust with your children or pets? Or whose children do you consider your own?

Anytime we can have a national holiday to celebrate women and their importance in all of our lives, let’s do it! But let’s broaden the way we think about Mother’s Day and show some love to all the other powerful, fabulous and inspiring women in our lives. So if you’re a mother in any way shape and form, go get yourself some flowers or pamper yourself in whatever way feels good to you. (Please remember you can do this all year long!) Or send a little note or text of appreciation to a special lady in your life. Together we can create a more inclusive idea of motherhood by cultivating love for all of the women in our lives and in the world who hold us down and lift up our planet!